Monday, July 20, 2009

Never Stop In Victorville

In my lifetime I've been in a few creepy situations. A guy tried to get me into his car when I was about eight years old just around the corner from my parent's house. I saw a guy defecate right in front of me at the 23rd Street Station in NYC. I even had a guy approach me when I was living in London mumbling something, and when I asked him what he was saying he yelled, at the top of his crazy lungs, "GIVE ME SOME F*#%#&@ FOOD" and then he swung his very heavy backpack at me, but I ducked out of the way of and then he proceeded to whack it over and over again against a dumpster as I quickly walked away. I mean, I've seen some pretty psycho things in some pretty gritty locations, but I think the Mini-Mart in Victorville, California might just take the cake.

I should have been suspicious when we pulled up and it looked like we had time warped into the 70's because the graffiti covered gas pumps were that old and had no place to run your debit card. I went inside to pay and to use the bathroom, and that bathroom was enough to make me vomit. Hard. It was waaay worse than anything I've encountered anywhere else. But I had to go, so I went, and then went out to the car to use the hand sanitizer. As I was waking to the car, a crazy homeless guy walked up to me and was asking me for something and I just kept walking, but he followed me to the car and as I tried to get in he was still mumbling something and tried to grab my door to stop me. It freaked me out. I just got in anyway, locked the doors, and shooed him away.

Steve was in the Mini-Mart with the boys using the dreadful bathroom, and was taking FOREVER as this guy paced around and I was drumming on the steering wheel nervously. It was taking so long, I started to get nervous. Turns out Jack was taking his time in that nasty bathroom, but when Steve started heading towards the car, the guy started approaching him and I was all "Steve, get in the car, get in the car, Steve," but he didn't hear me, and ended up giving the guy some money so he would leave him alone. I peeled out and got back on the freeway A.S.A.P.

Forget New York City, forget London, forget around the corner from my parent's house, in my opinion, the Mini-Mart in Victorville is now the scariest place on earth.


Mikilani said...

Looks like the kind of place you'd find a stun-gun wielding, rice bowl coiffed Javier Bardem! Glad you made it out of there alive!!! Hope to see you tomorrow. :)